Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen. – Winston Churchill
The story is told of Franklin Roosevelt, who often endured long receiving lines at the White House. He complained that no one really paid any attention to what was said. One day, during a reception, he decided to try an experiment. To each person who passed down the line and shook his hand, he murmured, "I murdered my grandmother this morning."
The guests responded with phrases like, "Marvelous! Keep up the good work. We are proud of you. God bless you, sir." It was not until the end of the line, while greeting the ambassador from Bolivia, that his words were actually heard. Bewildered, the ambassador leaned over and whispered, "I'm sure she had it coming."
For leaders, there is nothing quite as important as listening. In fact, according to a report in Business News Daily (http://bit.ly/ABntlJ) it ranks as one of the top reasons why employees hate their bosses – they do not listen. To be sure, there is a time and place for leaders to step up and speak up, but the truly effective ones know when to be quiet and listen. Here are three tips to becoming a better listener and why it matters.
To be informed, listen with your ears. This is the most basic form of your communication as a leader. Listening for informational purposes is primarily to receive information that one needs to perform a task or make a decision. It has little to do with anything beyond what is communicated at the time of delivery. And in some cases this is perfectly acceptable and appropriate given the circumstances.
But as a leader if this is your primary form of communication then you are not engaged with your team and are likely experiencing some form of deficiency with respect to how they view your leadership. Listening to be informed is necessary at times, but if you want to lead on a higher level you will have to step up.
To connect, listen with your heart. Informational listening is appropriate at times, but to lead on a higher level you will have to listen on a higher level. When your team members buy into your vision, when their passions are your passions, and when your goals become theirs goals – then listening to your team takes on a whole new meaning. And it is when you listen with your heart that you connect with their heart.
As a leader there is nothing more powerful than the ability to connect with those around you. Be it your staff, clients, or shareholders. The most meaningful and effective way of doing that is found when hearts are connected. Whatever the challenges you face or the goals you have if you have made that connection then together you can face it and together you can achieve it.
To demonstrate (listening), let your actions show it. Listening in some ways can be like paying lip service. You can go through the motions of listening but at the end of the day nothing changes. The same problems exist tomorrow that existed today and the levels of frustration only worsen. But as a leader who has made the connection with his people, the ultimate show of respect is given when you follow up with your actions.
To be sure, not every idea and not every proposal is going to be a fit. But the respect you show by listening builds your credibility as a leader and fosters a culture of respect. The greatest thing you can do as a leader is to create the climate in which ideas are welcomed and everyone has a voice that is heard.
Are you listening?
New data from the Marchez Institute reveals which U.S. states are the rudest, and which are the most polite. To rank the states on their rudeness, researchers listened to 600-thousand phone calls made between consumers and businesses and made note of each time they heard a swear word, or "please" or "thank you." People from Ohio, Maryland, New Jersey, Louisiana and Illinois were found to curse the most, respectively. While those from Washington, Massachusetts, Arizona, Texas and Virginia were found to be least likely to use swear words. The most courteous states were found to be South Carolina, North Carolina, Maryland, Louisiana and Georgia, while Wisconsin, Massachusetts, Indiana, Tennessee and Ohio were found to the rudest states.
When you have got an elephant by the hind legs and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him go. – Abraham Lincoln
A well-known story in some sectors of coastal communities such as where I live is that of the crab mentality. It is used to describe selfish or short-sighted people whose thinking bends toward the notion of, "If I can't have it, neither can you".
The crab basket mentality says that if you have a pot of crabs and one is climbing out in an effort to escape then the others will pull him back down rather than allow it to go free. The other crabs had rather share the same doomed fate than allow another among its ranks to climb out.
As a leader you may find yourself in a crab basket with others who have the same intentions for you. You get the raise or promotion and inevitably someone is jealous and you feel that subtle tug. You landed that coveted new account and strangely now begin to feel the claws of others around you. Every time you make an effort to move up and better yourself you have to resist the tug of those who would like to pull you down and hold you back. But you have to learn to let them go. Here are three things to consider as you climb out of the crab basket.
Let go of your past. Before anyone in your present can restrict you in a negative way you must lighten your load and let go of negative things from your past. So long as you hold on to past defeats, mistakes, or bad attitudes you will never climb to the heights you desire.
Your climb to the top of the basket begins when you make peace with your past and place yourself in a position to climb unencumbered toward your goals and dreams. When you let go of the past you can create your future. Your climb up begins here. You may have to forgive others; you may have to forgive yourself. But you will not move up so long as you allow your past to hold you down.
Let go of bad people. This is perhaps one of the hardest things to learn as a leader. But if you are ever going to climb your way to the top of the basket and live above the level of mediocrity you will have to separate yourself from those who want to hold you down.
It may be hard because up until now you may have seen these crabs as your friends. They have been colleagues; you have enjoyed happy hour together, and thought of them as allies. But keep this in mind - good people do not try to sabotage your success they celebrate it. Good people do not try attempt to pull you down and but had rather climb up with you. As a leader you have to wise up and recognize that not everyone in the pot with you wants to see you succeed. Be strong enough to acknowledge it and have the courage when necessary to climb alone.
Let go of small dreams. In the bottom of the crab basket there is not much room for growth and the view is always the same. The way out is up. It's when you fix your eyes on larger dreams and possibilities that you begin to realize that life in the basket is never going to change. The road to your improvement begins with the choice to climb out.
It's been written and asked many times but I will share it again here: What would you attempt to do if you knew that you could not fail? What are you dreams? I don't know what's in your heart but I do know this to be true – until you let go of your past, and let go of bad people, you will always have small dreams. It's time to let go of every bad attitude, toxic relationship, and negative influence that would attempt to pull you down.
Your way out begins with by taking the first step. Let go and start climbing!
As an entrepreneur I've had a few instances where service providers have promised me that once they complete a project I would 'own' it and have total access to it. Unfortunately, that has not been the case from my perspective. When I've had to make repeated requests for data, passwords, etc, frankly what I feel is held hostage by them.
If we're really going to be customer-focused, each of us should consider whether any of our customers, for any reason, might feel the same when it comes to doing business with us. The best customer service involves the customer – delivering a high quality product/service that fulfills their needs while providing them ease of access to all we offer in the hopes of growing our businesses together.
Here are four examples of how we might provide our customers with the information they need to easily do business with us. The 'in case I'm hit by a bus' papers, if you will.
1. Contact information:
Simply provide all customers with a roster of all your employees including job function, direct phone lines/extensions and e-mail addresses. If the customer wishes to contact someone for any reason they can do so easily.
2. Expectations and next steps:
Once the contract is signed, what are the next steps in your process to deliver your customer the finished product? Write those steps down and provide them in the form of a timeline working backwards. If the end product will be delivered in six weeks, let the customer know what will be happening in weeks one through six, who on your team will be involved, where they'll need to be available to make decisions, etc. This goes a long way towards putting them at ease and eliminates many questions and interruptions, all of which add up to greater efficiencies, productivity and profits.
3. Instructions:
Make accessing any instructions as painless as possible. Be succinct, use videos and/or photos where appropriate, provide links, outline the necessary steps in chronological order, etc. This is especially important when specific processes must be adhered to in order to generate desired end results. This also gives you a document to review with them to ensure steps are followed in sequence. Should turnover occur, this makes the on-boarding process easier. You should also post manuals and offer FAQ's and troubleshooting videos on-line.
4. All access:
A friend of mine is a web developer and he provides his clients with all necessary data, web addresses, links, etc. that they may need to access and/or monitor their project; he lists URLs, passwords, and a brief description of the client's domain registrar, web host, WordPress login, database login, etc. – everything his client would need to manage their website in the event that 1) they want to maintain their own site, 2) they're unhappy and wish to hire someone else, or 3) something happens to him. He then takes it a step further and provides complete instructions on how to add/change anything on the site, including screen shots so the client knows exactly what they should be looking at and where to click.
The main point is to always consider what the customer might be wondering about and do our best to provide them with the information they need for a hassle-free engagement with us. If we focus instead on protecting our business in a way that benefits us more than our customers we're just kidding ourselves about our true potential for long-term success and growth.
The judge who presided over Casey Anthony's murder trial 2 years said in an interview with NBC's Today show yesterday (May 6th) that he'd been shocked by her acquittal on charges of killing her 2-year-old daughter, Caylee. Judge Belvin Perry said he thought there was enough evidence for a 1st -degree murder conviction even though much of the evidence was circumstantial, and said that when he saw the jury's verdict, he read it twice to be sure, saying he felt, quote, "surprise, shock, disbelief." Perry also said he saw 2 sides to Anthony, the 1she showed to jurors of a wrongfully accused mother grieving for her child and the other that the jury didn't see who was controlling and not afraid to shout and curse at her attorneys, as she did when they talked to her about a possible plea deal. Still, Berry said he thought justice had been served with a jury verdict, but added, "Justice will finally be served one day by the judge of judges. She is going to have to live with this and deal with this for the rest of her life."
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Cicadas that have been growing underground since 1996 are about to make their once-every-17-years return along much of the East Coast of the U.S., from northern Georgia to upstate New York. The springtime emergence of the insects in late May or June is marked by the eerie mating music the males produce to woo females. University of Connecticut ecology and evolutionary biology professor Chris Simon explained, "When there's a lot of them together, it's like this hovering noise. It sounds exactly like flying saucers from a 1950s movie." People in the affected areas will see and hear the cicadas, but the insects don't sting or bite and aren't harmful to crops. After mating takes place, the females lay their eggs on twigs, which will hatch later in the season. When that happens, the nymphs drop to the ground and burrow underground to restart the 17-year cycle, next to be seen as full-grown cicadas in 2030.
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Could the length of your first name actually affect the salary you're paid? Online job-matching site The Ladders recently looked at the information from its database of over six million professionals and found that people with first names longer than five letters lose out on about $3,600 in salary each year -- and that's per letter over five. They also compared people who used nicknames instead of their full names and found that only one name out of 24 pairings -- Larry instead of Lawrence -- saw the longer name earn more, on average.
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Circumstances don't make a person; they reveal him or her. – Richard Carlson
The story is told of two hunters who came across a bear so big that they dropped their rifles and ran for cover. One man climbed a tree while the other hid in a nearby cave. The bear was in no hurry to eat, so he sat down between the tree and the cave to reflect upon his good fortune.
Suddenly, and for no apparent reason, the hunter in the cave came rushing out, almost ran into the waiting bear, hesitated, and then dashed back in again. The same thing happened a second time. When he emerged for the third time, his companion in the tree frantically called out, "Woody, are you crazy? Stay in the cave till he leaves!" "Can't," panted Woody, "there's another bear in there."
It's certainly not uncommon as a leader to be in tight spots from time to time. Like the two hunters you can find yourself in a bear jam that can alter the course of your day in a hurry. And when you take into consideration the way stress impacts your team members then it is important as a leader to put it all in perspective.
Research conducted by businessknowledgeresource.com (http://bit.ly/11Kaa6Y) cited some of the top causes of stress at work that include: no appreciation, no feedback good or bad, unclear policies and no sense of direction, random interruptions, and lack of control to name a few. If these causes or any other infringe on the daily demands of your leadership then the necessity for perspective will be even greater.
We learn from the example of the hunters four lessons to consider when you find yourself up a tree, in a cave, or otherwise stressed out by the demands of your job.
Don't panic. The first mistake the hunters made after discovering the bear was to drop their rifles and run. They immediately gave up any leverage they had by making a hasty decision based upon their assumptions.
When your first inclination as a leader is to panic without gathering all the facts you place those around you in compromising positions. Not every problem is as bad as it may appear at first glance and if you stay calm under pressure you can make smarter decisions.
Stick together. Each hunter reacted in a way that seemed right at the moment. One climbed a tree and the other ran into a cave. Now instead of being united in strength they are divided in weakness and have multiplied their problems. By doing their own thing they limited their options.
Sticking together and working together is a Leadership 101 principle. But when you consider the predicaments you can find yourself in when you ignore it then it makes the reminder worth repeating. John Wooden said, "It's what you learn after you know it all that counts." And in this case it can make the difference between sitting atop a tree as a meal-in-waiting for a bear and using your leadership skills to your advantage. Play it smart and stick together.
Consider the big picture. In the heat of the moment the hunters did what they thought was best. We all do.? But unfortunately they failed to keep the big picture in mind. Ultimately, it was not the bear they could see that was the problem but instead it was the one in the cave they didn't see at first.
Having a clear understanding of the big picture of your organizational mission and values is an essential element of your leadership. It's through the prism of the big picture that the smaller ones are put into context. Don't allow your immediate short term problem to change your long term view.
Run in the right direction. Out of fear the hunters ran. One ended up in a cave and the other in the top of a tree. Each had a perspective that was created by the direction they ran and where they stopped. While their problem (the bear) was stationary their approach was scattered.
Moving in the right direction is essential to solving the challenges you face as a leader. Having everyone on the same page is important. While differing perspectives is valuable it will not do you any good if you are not working in harmony.
It's as you refuse to panic that you succeed. It's as you stick together you win bigger battles. It's as you consider the big picture that you stay focused on your mission. And it's as you run in the right direction you solve the right problems.
Disguised as their reasons for why something is or isn’t happening, many sellers offer explanations that are actually excuses. Be careful to identify when this occurs so you don’t fall prey to them and can provide coaching on the importance of taking responsibility and being accountable. Those two values make up the foundation of true empowerment.
Here are a few examples of the reasons I hear most often:
No one returns my messages
The president killed the deal at the last minute
I sent a proposal and now they aren’t responding
They keep pushing back the start date
I assure you that in each of these instances, the seller has been misled or missed something important early on. Let’s take a look at each example individually.
No one returns my messages
It’s true that everyone is more mobile today and harder to pin down. That said it’s the seller’s responsibility to prospect; it’s not the prospect’s responsibility to reply. If you’ve left voice mail and e-mail messages that go unanswered either a) you haven’t discovered the best way to reach them yet; or, b) you’re not leaving an enticing message. Try something else. Half the fun of prospecting is figuring out how to ‘catch’ and meet new contacts. Make it a game – give yourself a goal for the day of how many new people you can reach and see if you can ‘win’.
The president killed the deal at the last minute
Sorry, but when this happens you’ve not been working with the decision maker. No matter what your contact may have led you to believe, the president had the final say so they were the decision maker you should have been working with all along. Ask more questions to uncover your prospect’s decision-making process before you come up with an idea or send a quote. Understand what you’re getting into before you get into or involve your team in it.
I sent a proposal and now they aren’t responding
Although hard to hear, it’s likely that they weren’t really in the market to buy. They were either shopping price, making sure their current supplier was their best choice or they wanted some information, which was likely provided at no charge. Again, get better at asking more pointed questions upfront so you can more quickly disqualify those that are just ‘kicking the tires’. Ask why they’d consider purchasing from you when they’re already working with a good supplier. Make them get ‘real’ with you in the first conversation.
They keep pushing back the start date
Similar to the example above, it’s likely there is no planned start date. If a date keeps getting postponed let that be a red flag for you that it’s not a high priority for them. As a rule, if a start date is postponed twice or more, there’s no planned purchase. Ask your prospect outright specifically when they plan to buy. Then ask them why that date is important. Then ask them what might get in the way of their making a purchase at that time. Understand upfront what roadblocks you might encounter so you know how to prepare and predict.
We’re all in business to grow and succeed. Let’s make sure we’re spending our valuable time with the most valuable prospects. And, let’s commit to not making or allowing any more excuses. When we hold ourselves, and others, to higher levels of responsibility and accountability we conduct better business.
New research links money to happiness. The research comes from Brookings Institute and finds that in the world's 25 most-populous countries, as households get richer, people report feeling more satisfied. Researchers say this new study disproves older research, which claimed there was a "satiation point" for wealth, and that people didn't feel any better once they made more than 75-thousand dollars per year. The new research finds the more one has the better they feel, and that applies no matter how rich or poor the country, or how rich or poor the people are within the country. (The Atlantic)
All I can say…DUH!!!!!
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